And in those times, you are reminded of how God is always so faithful, even working in your life to prepare you for things you’ll never anticipate or imagine.

Thanks Jesus

This week will include (but not limited to)…..

1) Observe 6-8th grade classroom
2) Prepare paperwork for the 8 hours of observation I’ve done
3) Open at work 3 times. 4:30/5:00am !!! (and close once)
4) Maybe get a new job (fingers crossed)
5) Prepare myself mentally/spiritually for 4 days of Youth Conference counseling this weekend.
6) Hair Cut
7) Plan photo-shoot for Choir in Meadow Vista
8 ) Remember to finish my observations for school ( I forgot to do ALL of them last week)
9) Not kill myself. (I anticipate this being the easiest of them all)

Yikes.  My job at Starbucks is hands down, the worst I have ever had.  I work with so many things that are terrible….it is all I can to wake up and drive there.  I am pray that I get this new job in Fair Oaks where my life can actually work, and I can actually be financially stable.

School is wonderful, no question about it, but its so stresful to manage it with the full time working schedule I have dispite asking that it NOT be 40 hours a week.

I feel gross because I have no time to do p90x, and I really want to do it.

I. need. a. break.

This is called a venting blog.

———————————————-

Despite all of this, Life IS good.

I have a wonderful loving girlfriend, Alissa, who stays with me when I am difficult and supports me when I need it.

I actually may soon have a job with a manager who appreciates her employees.

God has been blessing me with cool things.  Metro is moving to an awesome new building and its going to open up some awesome new doors for ministry, and for the first time in a while I have extra income in the near future that looks promising, and the Lord has given me a peace about my career path and what is to come.

I also realized that I can permanently delete my Facebook, which kind of sucks to do, but I KNOW it will be good for me so I hvae done it.

Its becoming true more than ever that God provides us with what we need on a daily basis, and its something I am having to rely on more and more each day.

In reference to #4 on the list I wrote just hours ago, I am indeed going back to school.  Its a Post-Grad Credential Program in the School of Professional Studies at WJU.

I have no clue as to how much work it will be, frankly, I am a little disturbed at the idea of spending at least $210 in the next two months on taking the CSET tests, which are only offered about 5 days before I am supposed to have taken them, so…DONT FAIL.  shoot.  It meets every Wednesday night from 6-10.  In addition there are 20-30 hours of online work to do.

I currently have 4 large books by my bed, not including the CSET study guide.  Its quite daunting.

But its ok!  I can miss….oh yeah, not a single class of I pretty much fail that portion of the program.

Well, good thing I have deleted my facebook.  Sometimes I think to myself….I wont last without it, but you know what?! People in the world HAVE survived without it, and they DO survive without it even today.  So, so can I.

Bring it on school. Im going to dominate your face.

1) Bible Bus. All the way.

2) Organization.  I have 5 moleskines in my bag, and I am not afraid to use them

3) Photography Blog.  Its in the works, and I am going to get it going soon. And, thats the beginning.  More photo stuff all together.

4) SCHOOL.  Its only once a week.  I can do this!  No procrastination!!!

5) P90X. Its been going good.  I gotta keep going.

Also, I deleted my facebook (see point 2 and 4). So, for those that care, I will blog more.

I have been desiring to blog about a number of things lately, and they have all just been spinning around in my head.  Ideas that is.  But, I will have to limit it to just one tonight as it is 10:30, and I work at 5am.

I had Strep last week, and I watched a number of documentaries.  One of them was on the Nationwide epidemic of Obesity.  It got me really wanting to watch the movie Food, Inc.  So, tonight with a room mate I finally got it and watched it.  Its was truly horrifying. It was almost like the terrible 3 minute PETA videos on YouTube, except with real facts, prolonged video coverage, interviews, and facts.  Facts not just about the food we eat, but about our government, food subsidiaries, costs…and a ton of other things.  It was really eye opening.

Instead of talking too much about the things that I feel should be talked about, I will just encourage you to pick it up and watch it.  Its not long, its not weird, and you will at least feel more educated about what you are spending hundreds and thousands of dollars on a year.  So here is what I am doing about it all.

I have been thinking of these things since the first documentary I watched, and now they all seem so much more worth while to me.

First, to make things easy, I think I am only going to shop at Whole Foods.  It basically…takes care of everything.

Second, I am going to shop at Farmers Markets as an attempt to only buy foods that are locally grown.  Locally grown food cost less for the farmers to produce, promotes local economy, and has a smaller environmental footprint, so I am going to try that as much as possible. (It’s also cheaper!)

Third, I am going to buy organic.  Its more expensive, but foods that have pesticides and antibiotics or hormones are the cause of things such as ecoli outbreaks, they have a lower quality taste, and often are not even ripe when picked.  They sometimes are not even real without SCIENCE!!!  In addition, many food products now that are genetically altered are under patents by large companies, which have made it illegal to save seeds(the natural way) and make farmers purchase seeds to grow crops each year.

Fourth, I am going to be very particular about poultry and beef or any other meat that I eat.  Nearly all cows eat corn although they naturally should eat grasses.  Ecoli was actually a result of farmers boosting the bacteria in the stomach of cows to allow them to digest corn.  AND, chickens are raised inhumanely in disease bread areas.

My room mate and I said to another room mate that its not about the money, its an issue of morality.  Kind of crazy if you think about it, but I believe it to be true.  One thing the documentary talked about was how a company put corn farmers in Mexico out of business, then hired them to slaughter pigs and cattle.  There is such disease that the workers were always getting sick, and there was a deal with the police to deport a certain controlled number of workers each week (because they were illegal).  Its just one example.  It was really just eye opening to how the large food companies treat people, and how they seem to only have in mind one thing.  MONEY.

So I am going to do my best to support the honest, healthier farmers and the food they have on a daily basis.  Im not going to change the world, but, one person at a time!

I like Jackson 5.  And Thriller….that whole album is amazing and classic.  I think he can dance rediculously well, but all in all, whatever.  He’s just a guy.

I was watching some video on youtube, and these people are screaming, and crying, and throwing up their hands in worship to this guy.

Frankly, I think as talented as he was, he was a total freak.  He screw around with kids, he made himself into a living freak show, and his entire life went to crap, all in the misdt of all these people worshiping him.

He obviously was never happy.  If he was, he would not have been involved with all the things he was involved with.  I guess that is what happens when you just give yourself completely over to sin.  It destroyed every part of his life, and through the one thing he was good at, he drove millions of people into a state of chaos upon seeing him, watching his concerts, and hearing of his death.

The more I think of it, his life is really sad.  I know that ultimately Christ is the final judge, but in my mind, I know where Michael Jackson is and it is not heaven.  He spent his entire life worshiping himself, and it got him fame, fortune, and now he is dead.  Forever.  Its really just sad how he could have made a REAL impact on the world, and instead, he just has record sales of music.

And, come on….most people only know like…5% of his music anyway.

I guess all I wanted to say is that….I am glad I am not where he is.

Praise Jesus.

And although his life is just some sad tragedy, there is that part of me that….probably wrongly is glad that he has died.  I suppose that it is wrong to wish that upon anyone, but there were honestly I think people in the world that REALLY WORSHIPED him.  And now, he is gone.  And I think I am glad a little, just so people know he is just like everyone else.

I think that people thought he was a god. But nope, he was a man.  And its all over now, so now I hope and pray that those lost in their lives worshiping that man would figure out what life is REALLY about.

Austin

.org

Check it out.  One day I was writing a psalms exegesis and I looked at Alissa as we sat in Peets and said, “I wish Richard was here….”
Well, he was not, but as we left, we walked out of Peet’s to him sitting in his car and he called us over.  After telling him what I just said laughing he says, “preceptaustin.org  its the greatest website ever for that”  So I checked it out.  And then wrote like 10 papers based entirely off of it.

so.  preceptaustin.org

Go there now.

P.S. its all done by ONE guy.  awesome.

On to more important things.

Yesterday I took my beautiful girlfriend to the beautiful Point Reyes National Beaches.  It was needless to say, a day filled with much beauty and fun.  We went to the light house, could hear seals below the cliffs, saw a 25 year old whale skull, and took pictures looking at the north and south California coast.  Also, on the way we decided to pretend it was Ireland because it looked like it, so I drove on the opposite side of the road, and we saw a Rooster, Cows, a cat with a mouse in its mouth, and a billion other things running about in the hills.  It was quite nice.  So, we got our beach fix, and it was oh so awesome. Oh, and we listened to Yo-Yo Ma and the Bach Cello Suites.  Life was perfect.

When standing on the cliffs there was a time then the lighthouse was a shinin, and you could hear the sound of this boat, who knows how far out.  The Fog had come in and you could see only maybe….a hundred yards.  By the time we left you could not even see the water any more.  I thought how crazy it would have been to navigate the sea without things like GPS and Radar and all these things we have today that make it…..easy.  The idea of actually NEEDING a lighthouse was kind of insane.  The sea is pretty darn scary if you think about it, its power and vastness and all.  I could not help but think, sheez God, thats….impressive for sure.

And, which was just as cool as the crazy ocean, was that I got to spend the day with my beautiful Love.  Shes great.  And, I am not a huge fan of beaches but I liked it very very much yesterday,  and I’m pretty sure she is why.

So I am on a kick these days to be hyper productive and do nothing wasteful.  I have given up TV, save watching Arrested Development, the occasional movie, and The Office.  But…just random shows, nah, no more.  Im going to read.  Also, I think I am going to go on a crazy diet again now that I live on my own.  I was reading health benefits of Matcha a bit ago.  It apparently can boost your metabolism.  huh.  So, Manny has these neat shakers so I will now be having for breakfast each day a protein drink, with soy milk (light!) and matcha….when I get some.  Also, I am going to cycle more.  I might soon ride to work and see if I really get all that gross on a day off to see if I can do it ever for reals.  And, I tried to ride from my place in Fair Oaks to Meadow Vista.  I made it 25.5 miles, and….like 1,400 feet vertical there.  It was brutal.  I think I need to work up to it.

Oh yeah!  I am going to try to do the agony ride next month.  Its a 24 hour cycle a thon for Christian Encounter Ranch.  It should be wicked brutal and painful, and a terrible experience physically, but….I am kind of looking forward to it.  Well, not IT, but like 3 days after my recover when I can look back on how neat it was.

So that is my rant on being productive, and healthy, and such.

This last Monday Danny was reading a psalm (47?) at the start of church, like he always reads.  Pastor Richard made a joke about how it was the largest psalms collection ever, because it was apparently a huge book with large print.  Anyway, I looked at it, and from where I sat like 20 feet away it almost looked hand written.  I don’t know if it was, I suppose I could have asked him, but I didn’t.  Either way, I decided for some reason, it would be best for me to start writing the Psalms.  Then perhaps Proverbs.  Then I thought maybe it would cool to just write my way through the whole bible like a scribe.  It would be a good way to remember right?? Then I thought of this bible Alissa got from her grandmother with all these hand written things through the WHOLE thing and thought…dude, I could like write out the whole bible in Moleskins and such and someday pass it on to my kids!  Thats when I knew I was getting ahead of myself.  But, nevertheless, I started earlier today.  I got 2/3 through Psalms following my bible bus reading before I had to go to work.  I am oddly excited.

Also I have been getting more excited to work at church.  So much so that then Taylre called me today trying to get people to do childcare for Friday night for the young marrieds, I told her I would do it and figure work out.  So, now after I close Thursday night at 9pm, I will be working Friday morning 4:30am-1pm.  Didnt think that through much…..but whatever gets me in!  I think a culmination of Starbucks disgust and needing money, thinking about jobs/future, and my annual summertime feeling of becoming an altogether greater person through everything has lead me to want to do something really……I dont know, productive with my life.  Not normal productive.  Productive eternally, for Jesus I mean.

At the end of Monday Night (big night i guess), I am standing, basically listening to Alissa talk to Danny about this music stuff for kids, and Richard comes over and tells him (Danny), “Hey, sorry to interrupt, we need you to anoint this guy with oil”.  He says it all nonchalant like.  Oooohhh. Ok.  Normal.  Not.  But of course, Danny is like, “oh yeah! ok!, sorry guys, I gotta go, catch you later!”  Richard said it so randomly/normal that Alissa didn’t even notice.  So I told her and she was like….really?!  I just thought….well….shoot.  I want to do something cool that’s worthy of that……..

So now I want to go off, learn guitar so I can do some music (if necessary), and start a church somewhere.  And be mostly poor.  But have money to survive and do occasional fun and support my family well, and….praise Jesus.  Like…..open a coffee place and just have friends lead worship and have bible studies there every day with different people and Sundays, and do ministry things.  Basically….live at church, with an espresso machine ( for witnessing duh) and praise Jesus all day.  And listen to classical music.  And play backgammon.  All while talking about Jesus.  And telling others about why we are all freaks and talk about Jesus all the time and have cheap coffee and always have someone teaching loudly inside.

Something.

I’m getting ahead of myself again.

I do that A LOT.  Yes…..

Well, that’s all.  And I don’t have much else to say that I remember so to spare you from more reading about nothing….

Good Night.

I was there, for about 30 minutes this morning as it was Kyles birthday, 21st, and we just went to the closest open place to grab him a nice legal drink.

As it turns out, it was one of the grossest places I have ever been.  It rivals Las Vegas casinos or casinos in general.  I don’t like casinos because they are filled with people who have no money.  Well, some might, but 99% of the people don’t have any money and because of their…addiction, or….lust over money they think that someday, once they have wasted away numerous paychecks they will strike it rich and   “American dream”.  I also don’t like the “American Dream”.  I think its….unbiblical.  Well anyway, So here’s how the night starts off…..

Get ID’d.  Walk into this place and see first an old plump lady singing in a lifetime-smoker raspy voice some awful song that is blaaaaring over the speakers.  Very, very loudly.  Some even older drunk as you know what come up to her and starts all rubbing up on her.  gross indeed.  So we make our way back to the non-karaoke area and sit around a table.  Kyle gets his drink and I sit there with my Tokyo Tea, enjoying the company of Kyle, Erin, and Klink as Manny and Shane play darts.  About 30 minutes later Shane and I take off to come home.

I observed many a things in that 30 minutes.  Waitresses that were 35ish dressed like they were 25, this lady that was rubbing her body on this guy for…..well every song.  Also, this girl at the end of the bar seducing some guy.  Countless drunk people.  Most everyone.  Random strangers talking to each other….it was ridiculous.

The whole thing made me wonder where all these people come from, and why do they come.  I mean, WE were there for a 21st birthday and had a Fridays or something been closer, we would be there.  I could not help but think that all of these people just seemed terribly lost and all.  They all some from their jobs/lives to get plastered at night and talk to random strangers.  Shane and I noticed in leaving that nearly all of them also had really nice cars.  Lexus, BMW, Hummer’s.  So, either they had lots of money, or they were waaay in debt.  Maybe, debt was why they were drinking……

However, its seemed to me as though all of the “adults” just….had really no life.  they show up, they drink the night away, they all somehow get home, or….someones house, and in the end are left vomiting their guts out, or with hangovers in the morning.

It just seems as though there should be SOMETHING better to do with your lives than that right?

I thought so.  And so last night I didn’t sleep at all.  I couldn’t place why I couldn’t sleep, but for some reason it felt weird. I think that was why.  I was just wondering before I climbed in bed what that whole thing is about. What drives people to do such….not fun things.

I have yet to figure it out.  It kind of drives me insane that people do that.  But, I am intrigued.  Its bewildering to me I guess what gives people the motivation to spend a night in a place like that to actually spend the night doing things, more than 30 minutes and a quick game of darts, I mean.

I think they all probably just need Jesus.  Actually, I know thats what they need, but its still upseting to think about why people do that, and what drives them to that point in their lives, even as grown adults.  Maybe ill figure it our someday, maybe not.

Until then, its bedtime, and I wont be thinking about it for much longer, as Tylenol pm will be in my belly soon.

night.